Yom Kippur - I'm wondering if Yeshua's washing of the disciples feet in John 13 is somehow better understood in the context of Leviticus 16. I have always kind of been at a loss for what exactly was meant by what Yeshua was doing in John 13. He explains it as serving each other, but I still always feel like I'm missing something, especially because I don't know what it means that he only needs to wash their feet as they are already clean. Anyway, while reading Leviticus 16 I was cued into the phrase "girded with a linen sash " in verse 4 at the same time Yeshua washing the disciples feet with the towel He girded Himself with went through my mind. Anyway, now they are connected in my mind and I'm in a bit of panic to think one way or the other because of how much it would mean in my heart and mind. Perhaps someone more knowledgeable can help me sort any truth or confusion out because it's a bit of an identity crisis I'm having here. I have a hard time figuring out how to live Biblical truth in this life on a communal scale because I don't personally see it in any fellowship. I attend church that is as Biblically based and strait as I can find, but not so Biblically based that they have a problem with Christian holidays or the manmade church structure. I can't help but wonder if the washing of the disciples feet was somehow a reference to Yeshua's priesthood and the context for HIs coming sacrifice bringing us in. I feel like Leviticus 16 may be context for understanding what He was communicating to the disciples more fully. I wonder if He was telling them that servanthood in this life is a type of priesthood they were being called to through Him. Because of Him, we are sanctified and brought into the presence of G-d - like He was calling them to become priests as in the commandment for Israel to be a nation of priests and a holy nation. It just feels like such a fulfillment of what was going on throughout Israel's history including what G-d called them to at Mt. Sinai. This whole thought scares me, but I'm really wondering about it because we are promised to become like Yeshua (minus HIs deity of course) if we submit to Him wholly in this life. If, I'm on the right track, then you can see how far from what we have been called we are as a body not just in that but in the Biblical basics, which I think is possible as I think as a body we have a longstanding misunderstanding and misappropriating of G-d's grace. It goes back to the whole idea that Yeshua did away with the law, but what does it really mean that He completed it. If it's the exact opposite of what we have thought, which fulfilled would be, then what would that imply? Maybe it means that we can actually more fully participate in it. Regarding misapplying grace.. "For if we sin willfully, after we have received the knowledge of the truth, there no longer remains a sacrifice for sins, but a certain fearful expectation of judgment, and fiery indignation which will devour the adversaries. Anyone who has rejected Moses' law dies without mercy on the testimony of two or three witnesses. Of how much worse punishment, do you suppose, will he be thought worthy who has trampled the Son of G-d underfoot, counted the blood of the covenant by which he was sanctified a common thing, and insulted the Spirit of grace? Hebrews 10:26-29 I'm kind of scaring myself here regarding what communal worship should be for me. I' m trying to find a way to participate with the people of G-d in a way that doesn't compromise Scripture. I really do trust Jesus to overcome all our confusion in HIs grace and strength. It's not about salvation for me. It's more about what do you do with what is potentially being revealed. I don't run into problems with ideas around Jesus and salvation in the church I'm going to. I run into problems with the holidays and the institutions themselves that have a lot of manmade regulations and expectations that I personally don't see grounds for in scripture, but that seems to be everywhere. I went back to church despite this because of the command to fellowship and I was too isolated when trying to avoid anything unbiblical. On the one hand I see something really potentially wonderful in how i'm understanding these passages now as if I'm not confusing myself I think perhaps Yeshua gave us a very real and kind of earthly but G-dly way we can actually still do the Torah in this world today. Through HIs Spirit and being made His Temple serving other people and having the freedom to serve G-d is how we are "doing" Torah. I guess I kind of knew that already, but in the context I'm now seeing it in, somehow it's just more real and more of a calling for testimony that He gave us. I feel like Yeshua is keeping what we can't of Torah now and through Him, we believers are now called to keep it as a testimony in this world. I don't think we understand the extent of what He was doing for us in this life. It's almost like we missed the testimony part for this life because we haven't included Torah. Perhaps that Torah testimony in this life is a huge part of why and how He chose to die for us, and it's in what He did for us that we can actually still keep Torah because He did do it all and make a way for us to follow Him. When I look at it this way, it's that much worse that we aren't recognizing His appointed days and keeping them because perhaps what Yeshua did for us is exactly why we can still keep them. Perhaps that was the point in this life for everything He did. In other words our testimony of who He is and what He has done is in that we can keep Torah. He's the sacrifice that takes away our sin, He's cleanses us in His own blood, He made us HIs dwelling place, He has perfected us to stand before G-d, and He gave us HIs own Spirit. He even promises us that we are to become like Him in this life. No one can accept that very well because no one sees it, but maybe we don't see it because no one has ever really submitted to it on the level I'm trying to speak about. I'm wondering how much without excuse true believers are in not keeping the moedim and doing the Torah. They all say the whole point was showing us we can't do it, but what then is their testimony.....that Yeshua can't do it because "I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me." It's like we've missed the whole point, and worse used Yeshua as an excuse to not do what G-d not only asked us to do but gave us His son to do. (now my mind is spinning what did G-d really offer us in this life that we have missed?) , What did Yeshua leave us to have to regarding Torah except remember it and keep it in dependence on HIm? I'm not knowledgeable in Judaism so maybe I'm just way way off, but Yeshua died and made us perfect before His Father.....the majority of what was done in the Old Testament that we can't currently do according to Judaism was about that from what I can see. If I'm on the right track, how much we are accountable for in failing to remember G-d's appointed days and disregarding Torah is pretty much on the same level as what we saw Israel do when they turned their back on G-d at Mr. Sinai, and maybe that's why or at least part of the reason why we are not seeing people becoming more like Yeshua in the church the way G-d promised us we would. What can we not do when you start thinking about all He has done for us in the context of Torah commands? What can we not do through Him? It feels like our whole mindset has been off in the church age, and we missed a huge opportunity just like what we see Israel doing at Mt Sinai. What if the whole point of this life as believers in the church age was keeping Torah through Him in this life just in testimony to all Yeshua has done, and we have totally turned our back on it. What if that was the main idea of our testimony to Israel as Gentiles brought in.....either I'm totally missing something or onto something that is really helping me pull a lot of stuff together. I do believe His Spirit has overcome all of what I described for those who truly submitted, but just wondering if it's a situation of G-d having to do for us more than we realized because of what we failed to teach or understand, and if maybe that's why we find ourselves in such circumstances as we are in that it's so hard to find (if not impossible) just a strait Biblical fellowship. I have decided to ere on the side of Christianity because I really do find that Messianic believers tend to idolize Judaism and diminish Yeshua, but that's off topic a bit. Just trying to say I don't think Torah for the sake of Torah is the right mindset. It's Torah for the sake of Yeshua - to draw close to G-d and live it - just seems like the whole point of Torah is being disregarded and ends up feeding into egos when you leave the entire point out. These are just my personal experiences as I've tried to find my way to something more Biblical and undo my own ego over the years.

Ha'azinu - This portion proved to be pretty overwhelming for me. It's hard to know where to start cause it all kind of runs together for me. "For the L-RD's portion is HIs people; Jacob is the place of His inheritance." Deuteronomy 32:9 Kind of insightful to consider this verse and the entire chapter on some level in the context of Israel's rejection of Yeshua. First it's consistent with what we hear G-d saying He feels in passages such as this. He feels like they are trying to leave Him out of what belongs to Him and what He, Himself ordained - His place in HIs own creation. Really, it's like we are trying to steal from G-d when we forget Him. (a liar and a thief from the beginning comes to mind because I really do think this passage is speaking on multiple levels of what G-d is doing and teaching us including what is happening between Him and hasatan through us as well) Second, on some level the Jewish people who still regard the significance of the land should be able to relate to Yeshua in terms of what it feels like when no one recognizes you or your G-d given rights and place on a level that literally destroys your identity. What the world has done to Jewish people, Jewish people have done to Yeshua. G-d is just that way and we will all come to terms with what I am beginning to see as basically just a sense of entitlement stemming from utter confusion about our place in G-d's creation. It should also scare Jewish people to consider what it means that Yeshua is Messiah - their entire identity is wrapped up in Yeshua whether they realize it or not as the land is definitive to Jewish people's identity and it belongs to Yeshua. Likewise the world itself whoudl fear trying to leave G-d out of this life generally. Just as the world can't take what belongs to G-d, Jewish people can't take what belongs to Yeshua. You cannot and will not inherit the land without Yeshua, just as you cannot inherit life apart from Him. Jewish people are showing the world spiritual truth about all of our existance and the choice we are making and can make. We cannot live and be who G-d made us to be without HIm. Why would He give us the land or this world to use it for anything other than what He made it for? It's fair, and it's the same problem we are all having. Israel shows us what's going on between all of us and G-d. This seems to be a consistent issue G-d reveals to us as between G-d and Israel when you look at their history as He repeatedly warns them and acts against them for forgetting Him. What strikes me is that you can hear G-d speak of rejection throughout Israel's existence - just like the world throughout it's existence. In that way, it really does feel like Yeshua is not only doing a lot for us to secure our inheritance, but saying a lot for G-d in terms of how He feels and HIs perspective in how we have treated HIm. We get to hear in Yeshua I think what G-d felt at the fall, what G-d feels about Israel's rejection from even before Yeshua, and what G-d feels every time someone thinks He has nothing to do with anything they have, do or their life generally. It's absurd how we treat G-d. We have rejected G-d as His creation in HIs creation. It's beyond pride really, it's just so obtuse, I can't even wrap my mind around standing before G-d with that level of unaware audacity. That's why I think I understand more what is happening through us as a testimony to hasatan. It doesn't matter how much you can do, you can only do it because of the power of G-d who allows you the ability to. And if He doesn't allow it, it won't happen, so evil isn't just evil. It's completely absurd. So as absurd as that is, is as absurd as it is for anyone with life and breath in this world to think they can leave G-d out of the life He made, is how absurd it is for Israel to think they can leave Yeshua out of His own land. It's hurtful and insulting to G-d, and foolish. The level of absurdity He has to work with on our part is just eye opening for me, so it makes sense then that He uses a foolish nation to deal with Israel. (Deuteronomy 32:21) It makes sense that G-d uses foolishness to deal with us in our sin, and as crafty as evil can be, it's also just foolish to think it can ever outdo G-d. How do you reason with that. I think we can relate a little more than a few years ago to what G-d is working with just because of how absurd the world is getting around us. People are dumbfounded at what they see happening, but I don't think it's as new of a trend as we initially think. I think we can see it is a longstanding problem just made worse as time has went on. Evil is not logical and it's getting very revealing how insane the worldly logic is getting. Anyway, somehow this passage helps me understand that Yeshua is a glimpse of G-d's perspective on what we put Him through, how we make Him feel, and it applies to the entire world regarding the earth the same as it applies to Israel regarding the land. Also, G-d can deal with absurdity but He's the only One. If you don't have Him, you will not stay sane in the world you are getting ready to endure. Throw your sense of entitlement and reason away because it will only lead to confusion, pride, and destruction. That's the general understanding I am coming away with - entitlement needs to be dealt with and put down. "But Jeshurun grew fat and kicked; you grew fat, you grew thick, you are obese! Then he forsook G-d who made him, and scornfully esteemed the Rock of his salvation." Deuteronomy 32:15 This is all about entitlement to me now. I always thought of it being just about a sense of security that causes you to forget G-d, but I really do think G-d is talking about a sense of entitlement that disregards Him and HIs place when it comes to what is His that He gives. How deeply rooted that is when you recognize that all things are from Him, and somehow in our utter dependence and undeservedness we have decided that our need is our right. It's insane, but how much better I can understand that just because of the world around me. Yeshua is Who straitens all that confusion out as far as I can see as He shows us our need and dependence that causes humility and love. Without Him it's like in the eyes of the world need becomes power and dependence becomes self-reliance. Just because G-d has to do for you, He has done for you, and now you think He has to do for you - it's just warped. It's just how much we rely on G-d without understanding what it means that we rely on G-d. We are so unaware because of how dependent we are on Him that we are totally off, but you can see it all around us that this unawareness leads to a sense of entitlement. This is why death and resurrection make so much sense for us as a consequence of the fall. They both show our total dependence and complete lack of rights regarding anything He has made. It really is the perfect illustration of how helpless and unentitled we are. One thing I'm noticing is that the world can not only look to Israel as an example of our choices regarding future, but also understanding our own human past. Everyone forgot G-d after the fall. "Of the Rock who begot you, you are unmindful, and have forgotten the G-d who fathered you." Deuteronomy 32:18 In a way, we can look at the nation of Israel for understanding all of human history in terms of how we got here, what we can do about it, and where we are going. Israel is kind of like a mirror for the world that way. I hadn't really thought as much about Israel teaching us about ourselves from the beginning, but it's interesting how much just kind of falls into place and naturally makes sense when I see it from that perspective. The world should look to Israel for hope and understanding in humility, and so blessing Israel really is just a part of who we are when you see it that way, especially when you see Yeshua as G-d's statement to mankind about what He has done and has to do for us. "For they are a nation void of counsel, nor is there any understanding in them. Oh, that they were wise, that they understood this, that they would consider their latter end! Deuteronomy 32:29 Anyway, it really does make sense that G-d brings us all into submission as not only His Creation but as those who have benefited and taken of HIs Creation. It makes sense that we die and are raised as those who belong to Him, and it makes sense that He gave us or forces us to choose Him or refuse Him. You have either participated in a gift of G-d with gratitude and humility that really does care for it, or you are stealing from Him and destroying what is His. IT's all about including Him in life or trying to leave Him out and the truth you cannot leave Him out of His own creation. We should be fearful of trying to leave G-d out of anything that is His whether it's the world, the land, or your own life because it really does just show our heart immediately and it's so presumptuous it reveals how foolish you are as well. It's the same kind of foolishness you can see in hasatan who is being used by G-d despite all He does to work against Him. "Now see that I even I, am He, and there is no G-d besides Me; I kill and I make alive; I wound and I heal; nor is there any who can deliver from My hand. For I raise my hand to heaven and say, "As I live forever, if I whet My glittering sword, and My hand takes hold on judgment, I will render vengeance to My enemies and repay those who hate Me. "Deuteronomy 32:40-41. You can just see G-d building all this up to a totally just and perfect day of judgment. We asked the question, and G-d is working up to giving us the perfect answer. Yeshua already showed us that we will not be able to answer Him back. (Matthew 22:46) Praise Yeshua for being so fair. Yeshua as Savior and Judge is totally consistent with Torah and the nature of G-d. And the way He handles His enemies is about salvation for those Who choose Him, so the grace in judgment is very on point. Why are demons allowed so much free reign to torment in believer's lives? I think one reason I can see when I consider what G-d has said regarding why He keeps us is so that He shows Himself supreme though the world He has made will be destroyed. hasatan is not the one destroying this world, but without us as a testimony that he cannot destroy despite his best efforts, I think maybe he would. "I would have said, "I will dash them in pieces, I will make the memory of them to cease from among men," had I not feared the wrath of the enemy, lest their adversaries should misunderstand, lest they should say, "Our hand is high; and it is not the L-RD who has done all this." Deuteronomy 26-27 Salvation in a fallen world speaks to something between hasatan and G-d I think that puts hasatan's own questions to rest. I don't know - a lot going on in this portion for me so hard to pull it all together and explain it well without going in circles, but fear G-d and know your place in His Creation is not one you're entitled to. We are not so different from hasatan to not make the same mistake. He does have a place for you whether you want it or not. He made you and there's really no more to your story than that. Israel as a nation really does show the world it's place and choice perfectly. And something I'm having a hard time verbalizing is that the fact G-d is so beyond us that He can allow us to choose should be fearful, but instead we have a tendency to allow it to cause us an undue sense of power and pride. Not exactly sure what's going on there, but the power we have to choose reveals a lot about Him that I think is fearful. It shows us there is an opposite to what He intends for us, and at HIs hands.

Nitzavim-Vayelech - I'm trying to understand how Deuteronomy 29:29 fits into the context of this passage. "The secret things belong to the L-RD our G-d, but those things which are revealed belong to us, and to our children forever, that we may do all the words of the law. It follows a section about the consequences of idolatry and precedes a section discussing how the nation will repent after falling into idolatry and being scattered. G-d basically seems to be saying you are going to fail me, but you will return because of Me in Deuteronomy 30. I'm not sure what "secret things" might mean unless it's tied into falling into idolatry, but I have to conjecture too much to feel comfortable trying to make sense of this verse. Another verse I'm curious about is Deuteronomy 31:1-2 "Then Moses went and spoke these words to all Israel. And he said to them; "I am one hundred and twenty years old today. I can no longer go out and come in. Also the L-RD has said to me, 'You shall not cross over this Jordan.'" There's more to this regarding his age than physical ability as we read at the end of Deuteronomy in 34:7 that after Moses died, 'his eyes were not dim nor his natural vigor diminished." You could just assume it was because G-d said he could not go, but then why did Moses mention his age regarding his ability to "go out and come in". The only thing that comes to my mind is G-d's statement in Genesis 6:3 that he will not contend with men forever and his days will be 120 years, but that then causes me to question my previous understanding of the Genesis verse as well as we know people did live past 120 years. I can't help but wonder if Genesis somehow ties into this verse with what Moses was saying. I have understood Genesis 6:3 to be about the timing of the flood, but now I feel like Moses was somehow referring to G-d contending with men somehow in this verse. The timing of Moses death and just how it's being referenced as G-d describes what will happen with the people seems to point to something I'm having a hard time understanding or seeing generally. It's strange how on one hand Moses is the one dying and not entering the land, but then he's also being saved as we hear how the people will fall into idolatry when they enter the land and G-d is with Him as He is about to die in a way we just don't see with anyone else. In contrast, the people are going to inherit the land but then will experience the curse and fall away, and G-d knows their hearts are not with Him. Just a paradox in here that I'm grappling with I think. On one hand we see Moses dying but inheriting salvation, and on the other hand we see the people inheriting the land and then choosing to die. It's just odd and I think there is a lot happening in this portion that I hadn't really noticed before. G-d brings things to my mind during the week as I read these portions. I'm not always sure exactly how they relate, but I think it does so noting it so I don't forget. The other day I realized how frivolous I can be with my physical life sometimes in my attitude just because I know He has me. I know I have to die, and I know He has to raise me. We are blessed to live with this unattached attitude to our bodies as believers who know we will part with them but He will restore us in perfection. There's a comfort in this that I know He wants us to have, and I know we need to have it to get through this life so He gives us this. And I know Yeshua died and rose from the dead so I should take comfort in what He has done, but for the first time I thought how painful it is for Him to watch what He has created, died for, and loves decay - not just die, but dust to dust deteriorate. I keep coming to these spiritual understandings about the physical world as I go through these portions, and I think there's something going on in this portion related to that thought for me. "Then the L-RD said to Moses, 'Behold, the days approach when you must die..." Deuteronomy 31:14. Something is happening with Moses death and rest in light of the people crossing over the Jordan to live but G-d knowing they will choose death. Morbid I suppose, but I think He wanted me to see that He hurts more than us on account of our deaths that way. I think He is showing me how consistent Yeshua is with all He has ever done. I can't really imagine what He 'sees" when He looks upon this earth, but that gives me some context for what He means by corruption as being the context for who we are. I mean if G-d didn't raise us and keep us, what do we have.....what do we really offer up to G-d apart from Him - dust. Maybe this is getting to the idea of what's going on in the sacrificial system for me. One more concrete understanding is in terms of the tone of the passage I think. I really do think I hear that G-d did this for the people only because of the promises He made to Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob. It's like He's saying so much about His nature in that He knows all things. He knows they will fail Him, but He does not go back on His word. It's how He saves us and forgives us, and you can see in His nature why it's only through the perfection and faith of Yeshua that we are kept by Him. He knows us, but Yeshua and HIs Covenant. Maybe G-d is preparing me for Yom Kippur, as I really do feel like the general take away for me from this portion is simply how much we hurt G-d and how much He has always taken upon Himself in terms of our suffering and pain. Even as saved people who through His Spirit can actually do things pleasing to Him, in the physical state we are in, we really do grieve Him. Yeshua suffered in this life in a very physical way, but it's not like G-d wasn't already suffer for the sake of salvation all along anyways. We know He never takes pleasure in death, so do we think He enjoyed killing Egypt's firstborn so we could be saved.....It's like everything that happens has always involved G-d enduring some sort of pain and suffering on our behalf, so the death and suffering of Yeshua is an expression of something G-d has always done for us. Why would He do that is a question we could ask of literally everything He has done for us I think. He has always chosen to suffer on our account. I don't know, just seems almost too consistent for me at this point. I feel like I'm missing something and it's almost too simplistic to see it like that, then the other part of me thinks I was just too proud and foolish not to see it before now. I never really saw how much G-d the Father suffered on our account before He revealed G-d the Son. It's really only in Yeshua that G-d can rejoice over us. Imagine everything that G-d rejoices in hinges on Yeshua. It's so foundational in my mind now that we can give G-d absolutely nothing but acknowledging HIs Son. There's nothing good for G-d to see in this life apart from Yeshua. That's it, nothing else gets anyone anywhere. Really amazing how much revolves around only Him. Without HIm, G-d would not be loved. and so G-d what purpose would G-d have for putting up with any of this Just hard to imagine G-d not being loved and how much Yeshua has secured, but that's the truth. He really is the only reason anyone of us are here. You see - that whole issue with letting go of my identity that came up for me several weeks or months ago - I just saw how foolish and ridiculous it is. I wouldn't be able to do anything that's come to matter to me. I wouldn't be able to love or know G-d. I kept getting hung up on not being able to imagine who I will be if I hand over my identity to Him, but I can't imagine who I would be without Him up to this point either so we really don't know much about our own selves and praise Yeshua who saved us from having to. I don't think people understand how much hinges on that one person, whether you're a believer or not, you owe Him.

Yom Teruah - Rosh Hashanah (Genesis 21 - 22) "And Abraham called the name of the place, The-L-RD- Will-Provide...." (Genesis 22:14) This verse seems to be the overall theme of these chapters, but it's interesting to consider how the people in these chapters responded to G-d's provision. "And Sarah said, 'G-d has made me laugh, and all who hear will laugh with me. She also said, "Who would have said to Abraham that Sarah would nurse children? For I have borne him a son in his old age." (Genesis 21:6-7) I love how the moment she insulted G-d by laughing in disbelief upon the promise of Isaac now seems to have turned into a really beautiful realization and understanding between her and G-d. It's just a touching memory to consider - how far Sarah and G-d had come together. It reveals a relationship between them, and it's in her son's name. Just really beautiful humility and gratitude in Sarah for what G-d provided. And we are blessed that she responded in humility and gratitude to the truth, and we can see it in how she uses the word "laugh" and to read it thousands of years later laughing with her knowing she was right. I think she was so purely joyful and happy, G-d blessed her by giving her a way to share it on and on with us, and she knew it. That understanding is such a little thing in the bigger picture, but the fact G-d cares so much and apparently saw so much in her in that moment, just reminds me how important we really are to Him. Nothing about you or your life is little in G-d's eyes. Another note is how happy Sarah was for Abraham. Sarah has become really dear to me over this last year. A really beautiful and pure humanity in Sarah that I think people don't always see because of the issues with Hagar. Then we see how Hagar and Ishmael respond to G-d's provision in the desert when they had no water. "And G-d heard the voice of the lad. Then the angel of G-d called to Hagar out of heaven, and said to her, 'What ails you, Hagar? Fear not, for G-d has heard the voice of the lad where he is. Arise, lift up the lad and hold him with your hand, for I will make him a great nation.' Then G-d opened her eyes and she saw a well of water. And she went and filled the skin with water, and gave the lad a drink. So G-d was with the lad...." (Genesis 21:17-19) Here I think we can see some level of entitled lack of understanding and gratitude, maybe it's tied into a jealousy. There seems to be no response of indebtedness and so we see no real relationship or understanding. I think that's a fair consideration as the word of G-d is truth. If Hagar or Ishmael had said or reacted to G-d in a way other than what's presented here; a way that shows understanding and acknowledgement and some relational awareness, we would know it. Then we see Abimelech tell Abraham in Genesis 21:22-23, "G-d is with you in all that you do. Now therefore swear to me by G-d that you will not deal falsely with me, with my offspring, or with my posterity; but according to the kindness that I have done to you, you will do to me and to the land in which you have dwelt." Then we see Abraham rebuke Abimelech, give him 7 ewe lambs as a testimony to truth, and make a covenant with him regarding wells Abimelech's servants had stolen from Abraham. So here what G-d provides is rebuke and truth. Abimelech asked that Abraham not deal falsely with him, and Abraham shows him that his G-d has nothing to do with falsity but to expose it. You can even see the life-furthering gift that it is to expose it as Abimelech was given seven ewe lambs as Abraham righted the wrong. Abimelech had some fear of G-d, and so Abraham really did help him out here by putting it right I think. But at the same time, it's like Abimelech thinks he can trick G-d. Meanwhile. there was no direct interaction between him and G-d I think because he just seems to want to have nothing to do with G-d. Really bizarre thought process happening her I think. The whole conversation began over his fear of G-d and recognizing Abraham's relationship with G-d, but somehow in this exchange Abimelech never actually recognizes G-d's hand in it. He's asks for provision, is given provision, but it seems like he never actually sees it. Finally, we see Abraham willing to sacrifice his son at G-d's command, but G-d intervened to show Abraham what He already knew, which is G-d will provide. "Then Abraham lifted his eyes and looked, and there behind him was a ram caught in a thicket by its horns. So Abraham went and took the ram, and offered it up for a burnt offering instead of his son." (Genesis 22:13) All of this context points my mind back to the Ki Tavo portion. I think it's because what G-d provided Sarah and Abraham, they both turned around and handed it back to Him similar to what we see in the commandments of the firstfruits. In contrast, Hagar and Abimelech just took from Him. Things are lining up for me in these two portions in the idea of how do we respond to G-d's provision. In the same way the firstfruits belong to G-d whether you acknowledge it by offering them back to Him or not; If you have life, you have already taken of salvation whether you have accepted it or not. We exist because Yeshua has given G-d a reason for us to. It's that way from the beginning to the end. We exist because of the grace of G-d that's through Yeshua. Without Him there's no reason for G-d to go through this with us. There's no reason for this world to be going on. How we are all fundamentally dependent on Yeshua whether saved or unsaved strikes me because then it just makes sense that our eternal life is determined by how you respond to Yeshua in this temporal life. it's fair and completely on point as we can see in Sarah, Hagar, Abimelech, and Abraham. How they responded to G-d's provision showed the heart they had for G-d. In the same way, how you respond to Yeshua, really does show what's in your heart toward G-d. So it's fair that G-d then uses that to determine what He will do with you because it's about do you want a relationship with Him or do you just want life without Him. And if you want life without Him, that's what you will get. You can also see, especially in Sarah I think, how much G-d is willing to work with you and rejoice with you as you grow in understanding and He forgives you. Just seeing how He has to forgive us to keep us and grow us is a whole new realization of how dependent we really are. He is literally there for anyone, but He can really only teach a heart that honors him because that's the only heart that not only sees Him but wants Him enough to listen to Him. Without Yeshua Who forgives us, changes us, and teaches us, all of everything falls apart. There's no reason for G-d to have anything to do with us. We exist on the grace and hope and faith we can only have through Jesus. Our life is based on hope from the beginning to the end, and the hope is and has always been only in Him. You are way off if you think you have any grounds for impressing G-d with what you did or can do or that He even cares to hear what you did or can do. I think this is where we can see that this choice and hope He has given us in love and grace in Torah has went to people's head, and a lot of Scripture I think is about sorting that out. We sometimes confuse this love and hope He give us with power over Him if we do not know Him. So I think it's just ultimately about Him showing us Who He is so that we do see we are utterly powerless and helpless except for Him. In that way, you can see that the choice is really about how do we respond to our dependence on Him. Somehow in all our powerlessness, do you see that through Yeshua. G-d has given us an option we otherwise don't have. We have the power to choose life just by accepting Him. The really miraculous thing in my mind now that I understand more about Him is that we were ever allowed to say no to G-d. It's not so much why did He put the tree in the garden in terms of His character. It's why did He think enough of us to give us a choice. Same issue, but different perspective. That's where I see G-d so far above and beyond anything we or hasatan could come up with. Free will and the wisdom of G-d to use it to teach us to truly submit and acknowledge His power over us in truth and gratitude moves us into a really beautiful eternity totally uncorrupted and full of knowledgeable worship. We will live an eternity knowing not just worshipping and existing with Him but wanting to exist with HIm and knowing why we worship Him. That for me is enough of a reason for this life in terms of where we started compared to where we will end up. Because of the fall, G-d can truly destroy evil and those who love Him have learned about G-d and all He was doing for us when we didn't realize it. Isn't that amazing. We are actually learning how much like G-d we are not, and in that how much more reason we have to praise Him. All the power He has over us, and He has used it to empower us just to show us He loves us so we can know Him and why we worship Him. He really is a G-d of freedom. "For G-d so loved the world that He gave HIs only begotten son, that whoever believes in Him shall not perish but shall have everlasting life." (John 3:16)

Ki Tavo - "And it shall be, when you come into the land which the L-RD your G-d is giving you as an inheritance, and you possess it and dwell in it, that you shall take some of the first of all the produce of the ground, which you shall bring from your land that the L-RD your G-d is giving you, and put it in a basket and go to the place where the L-RD your G-d chooses to make His name abide. And you shall go to the one who is priest in those days, and say to him, 'I declare today to the L-RD your G-d that I have come to the country which the L-RD swore to your fathers to give us.' Then the priest shall take the basket out of your hand and set it down before the altar of the L-RD your G-d, and you shall answer and say before the L-RD, your G-d: 'My father was a Syrian, about to perish, and he went down to Egypt and dwelt there, few in number and there he became a nation, great, mighty, and populous. But the Egyptians mistreated us, afflicted us and laid hard bondage on us. then we cried out to the L-RD G-d of our fathers, and the L-RD heard our voice and looked on our affliction and our labor and our oppression. So the L-RD brought us out of Egypt with a mighty hand and with an outstreteched arm, with great terror and with signs and wonders. He has brought us to this place and has given us the land, a land flowing with milk and honey'; and now behold I have brought the firstfruits of the land which you , L-RD have given me " This passage has become a guide in my heart and mind for what I imagine will be my confession before G-d One Day when I'm about to take physical possession of my inheritance of eternal life I'm given through my Savior. If you come before G-d with anything except the understanding of who you are, a sinner like your father in contrast to who you are in Him, saved and restored, and that all you can offer Him is that truth and the gift He Himself has given you, Yeshua, that is literally life; you can see right here in this passage, you will have nothing. You stand before him with nothing but failure as He did give you life and sustenance. Isn't that something - it's clear how He does things and our beliefs are Torah truth. Sometimes I just really need to let that sink in because of worldly confusion and constraints as a Gentile believer in Messiah Yeshua. This is the first passage that kind of shows me what I think Paul was getting at when he said there's a veil of Jewish people's eyes. "But their minds were blinded. For until this day the same veil remains unlifted in the reading of the Old Testament, because the veil is taken away in Christ." 2 Corinthians 3:14 This verse also makes it clear why they are blinded - the rejection of Yeshua. I'm kind of coming to see that Israel as a nation really fundamentally is just G-d showing the world basic Spiritual truths. If you reject Messiah Yeshua, you are making yourself blind to G-d's revelation and cutting yourself off from His presence and blessing. This is not just true for Israel and Jewish people. It's true for each individual, but G-d is basically using Israel as a witness one way or the other, as He does and will all of us in the end. This is something I love to think about. You will testify to the truth of G-d and gorify G-d. It's not a rigged game. It's a reality that if you have lived life, you have taken from Him and therefore you do and will testify of Him. You will either submit in gratitude or rebel ignorance, but that fact you have life will testify for or against you one day. The fact you have a Spirit will testify for or against you one day, and the fact you have eternity before you will testify for or against you one day. But in all situations, life, Spirit, and eternity will testify for the truth of Yeshua because all of it is through Him including you and the choice you had in Him. It's not rigged, it's just truth. You have life because G-d gave it to you, and you either acknowledged that through accepting Yeshua or you didn't. You're choosing life or death in rejecting HIm - not G-d. He chose life for you, and Yeshua is the testimony of that. You can see in this portion that eternity itself will testify to Yeshua, and this is where I find encouragement spiritually for right here and now because in this verse you can actually see how faith is taking possession of our inheritance now, in this life. We can take possession of our eternal inheritance through just believing and living a life that testifies to it. These are the spiritual battles we are fighting - just to believe and testify to it. It is so much bigger than I realized just to believe. I'm always kind of struggling to find my place in Scripture because it feels like there's this huge hole that goes unaddressed and it's where the Gentile believers are kind of falling through a gap between believing Israel and unbelieving Israel in what Scripture specifically speaks to in terms of time. Unbelieving Israel has left us a hole in Scripture it feels like sometimes. It's like we see G-d speaking to other times, past and future, but not specifically to our time as Gentiles in the some sort of gap. Now I can really see that it's our faith that fills in the gap. This is the time of faith and grace and just professing Yeshua as the beginning and the end, and the only way from the beginning to the end. It really is a time of revelation and spreading truth. We are in the Biblical line of faith through HIs grace just through believing in Him. And it's really good to see, it has never been any other way. I know this is all spoken to and said better in Scripture, but I always take the long way around to really internally understand what G-d is saying. Because faith and grace are spiritual, It's easier for me to see my place as we are fighting spiritually for this line and inheritance. We are between a lot in this world in terms of earthly revelations, but that "lot" that's between is a lot of huge spiritual significance, a lot of grace and a lot of hope and opportunity. When I see things that way, I realize how foolish it is to dismiss how significant we really are. Then realizing the rest of this passage is also convicting of how significant we are - we are literally talking about life and death, blessing and cursing. I keep looking for where are the faithful people rising up against evil. I want to see Christians crowding the streets the way we see anarchists doing. Not screaming and burning, but just standing up and against evil for the hope of good. Just reading scripture, and maybe if someone is wrongly arrested, the faithful need to step in just to protect the definition of right and wrong; innocence and guilt; justice and injustice. We are allowed to speak and protest too. Why are we griping so much over masks and gathering around a politician, but no voice is above it all to speak to the evil of injustice and confusion being imposed on our society? This is where we need to see that we cannot rely on our government or our civic leaders to speak for us. They are not speaking to the truth that G-d is G-d and He is good and available to all to make pure and holy. It makes no sense to me that for some reason the people of G-d can't get organized around Biblical truth. I guess it's just evil, but where is the Spirit of G-d moving in this nation? It has to be somewhere. I keep waiting for the voice of fasting and repentance to be called out by someone with a spiritually loud voice and big platform, but I personally don't hear it. I see people talking about G-d and occasionally see someone say we need Jesus, but somehow evil is more organized and targeted in this battle than us. Maybe it's going to take individuals being drove to dependence on the L-RD for repentance and truth, but how terribly sad that is for the vast majority of people who need truth when we have G-d's Spirit. And you know what, they are looking for it. They may not know what they are looking for, but they are looking for something true and sincere and good. Instead of sitting here scared of our own kids, we need to see they are looking for something better than what we have handed them or shown them. How terribly sad it is that we don't seem to have it together enough to even know how to fight for them. If they don't have Christian parents, L-rd have mercy and call them your own child because what other hope is there for them? Why is evil so organized and the people of G-d are left floating around barely able to get by on their own faith? I don't understand how we can accomplish anything in this world for the sake of this world if it's somehow just all about our own selves barely getting by and just fighting to go to church with other people who are likely already saved. Are we just barely clinging on to what faith we have at this point already? You know what if they kick us out of the church, time to take it to the streets. Time to go to the local park and just tread scripture and pray. Time for Christians just to gather outside then. I do think there is a congregation in California who is doing that - being somehow more public, but I'm not sure how Biblical they are. What did Ezra and Nehemiah do to turn the people's hearts - they just read Scripture. What did John the Baptist do - preach repentance and Baptism. What did Yeshua do - just taught lessons based on real life. Maybe we need to stop with the needing more and more for our own sakes, and just start giving other people what we know and we already have -strait and simple truth. Regardless, I hope the rest of the nation doesn't have to become like California for us to start fighting back. We need to be fighting for everyone's rights, not just our own rights to not wear masks and be able to gather in a building. Our kids have a right to hear the word of G-d and if so choose, embarace it or walk away from it. But where are they even hearing it from is a question I'm really starting to wonder about. Where are kids who don't have parents in church hearing the Gospel in this country? Here's the truth - the public square and schools have already stepped over the constitutional lines so why are we letting them shut us up based on them? In my mind it's all in at this point. They broke down the constitutional barriers and rights so now you either let evil take over or you take advantage of the true freedom to speak it. We could be reading Scripture and praying in the public square if they can burn our flag and scream death to America... at least it would force the truth to be seen as they try to force us to shut up. Kids would see how we are treated and it would plant a seed to consider such a difference. Let their own response reveal them for what they are -either they sincerely are seeking what's good or they are liars and deceivers who hate what's good. At least the people and kids in this nation would see the choice they have to make and the truth underneath what's happening. Its a spiritual battle and there's something more to this than I thought. Kids are very perceptive so my hope is that, those kinds of truths will mean something to them spiritually and make a spiritual impression that gives them so me hope for discernment and truth. At least they would be confronted with their own hypocrisy if they refuse it, and at least G-d would have to be part of the conversation if they hate and oppress us but love and encourage evil. Maybe this is about forcing lines on the other side, make them talk about us. There are those who are sold out to sin and evil, but there are those really looking for something meaningful and true. They are having a lot of conversations and a lot of them are seeking, but G-d is not in the conversation because for some reason Christians don't seem to know how to represent truth outside of our own church - maybe G-d is going to shut the churches down just so we actually do what we are called to do and go out. I don't know just a thought I'm having as I try to understand what's happening. Don't forsake fellowship, but fellowship is about strengthening us to do HIs will in the world. It's not about us that way, but feels like somehow we have made it so. I'm struggling on this issue as much as anyone else, so talking to myself about what is it I'm really supposed to do with what He's handed me. It scares me that I'm not doing much with it, and I just don't see the church as a whole standing up for the sake of anyone but itself at this point. That may be a wrong and unfair impression. I just think we need to see the obligation that is there in these young generation who just seem to be in rebellion as we indulge them instead of teach them. Maybe I'm missing something, but if the church doesn't stand up and step in on their behalf, I just think we are failing them yet again. Here's the hope. We see what's here now. We see this is spiritual. Don't let it just hide away. Demand that it be addressed, and pray G-d doesn't let the devil just slither around in the shadows again. Let it all be revealed - what has been going on in the institutions of this country to destroy our kids.

Ki Tetze - Just seeing in the laws how protective G-d is when there's a large power differential between people. It says a lot about G-d's own heart because He is all powerful over us. It makes every human power trip utterly stupid, pathetic and blind. There's just something really revealing in these commands about how much He understands our condition and hearts. How quickly a position of power over someone reveals a heart. G-d's heart is beyond my comprehension, but I see a lot of love in how He treats us when considering these commands and HIs place of power over us. I also think we see G-d reveal the opposing heart and His wisdom about the human heart in HIs instructions regarding Amalek at the end of this portion. The laws about not mixing different or opposite things together intrigues me. There's something here about boundaries and place that I think could help in avoiding mental and emotional strife and confusion. How much does the way we regard things externally as somehow intrinsically separate and distinct affect us mentally? How much do basic lines and distinctions help people be mentally well? The world would call it healthy boundaries, but G-d is just saying this is this and that is that. They are separate. He is just acknowledging and teaching a basic truth and reality for us to regard. I don't know but being mentally strong for us as believers does mean not mixing things in with HIs Word and Way, so I do think external order helps strengthen us mentally. It's really about internal organization to be able to see things for what they are I think, and how society presenting things for what they are encourages that. We usually understand it the opposite- internal disorder results in external disorder. But I'm saying as a society, perhaps we are causing mental problems and disorder when we refuse to just assume a basic standard of this and that or right and wrong. It seems pretty obvious when I just say it that way. It's literally causing confusion, and it's also pretty pathetic that academia can't apply organization to morals when it has tried to order and organize everything else. It's really fundamentally contrary that way. The world of taxonomy and classification can't allow us to assume the basic social categories of right and wrong. They are literally encouraging confusion with what they call open-mindedness and they should know it based on how much they rely on organization and distinctions to make their own claims. there is a system in place that is working to mentally tear us down based on what they know about order and disorder, organization and disorganization by imposing it on what they want to destroy. Compare what they rely on in Science to what they force on us in the humanities and philosophies....how sick. Worldly people will call it closed-minded and rigid thinking, but we believers need to start recognizing what they call rigid-thinking may actually be mental health and stability. If they can dare to categorize all of nature, we can dare to categorize our daily lives. Try applying categories to morals the way they do science, and all the sudden you can see what they have done. They have imposed disorder on individuals and morality. I am just seeing a lot of holes and hypocrisy in how the academic world approaches things and I really think the way our kids are being encouraged to look at the world is just ultimately about making them mentally weak and susceptible. One thing I just want to remember to encourage families and help people fight against confusion that undermines us is Deuteronomy 24:5 - "When a man has taken a new wife, he shall not go out to war or be charged with any business; he shall be free at home one year, and bring happiness to his wife whom he has taken." It's the order G-d gives and puts in place that reminds me strong families, strong state...weak families/weak state. Also, similar to what I discussed about mixing things, those who were afraid were sent home so as not to affect the rest of the army negatively. So the overall theme I'm seeing is that a healthy and biblical view of the external world that makes distinctions and acts on them, and an understanding of the way He orders things will help us be mentally and morally strong. I really think this is key in how we can be strong as a body in this world. Also, as a side note that kind of pulls all this together for me, morally strong people are mentally healthier. This is just evident in the society we live in, so have no shame in applying G-d's order to your own life and know that the world is trying to selectively do the same thing. It hasn't come up with anything better than order and distinctions. It's just trying to apply it selectively so as to tear what He does down. It really is pushing for chaos and complete disorganization in what it is doing to people's minds and thought processes. All while it relies on Torah truth of order and distinctions to put forth it's own system and lies to even know how and what to tear down. I think we need to see that evil is very systematically seeking to destroy us, and it is using Biblical truth to its own advantage. We can rely on Torah more than we realize to combat the lies around us because of that.

Shoftim - "Whoever is deserving of death shall be put to death on the testimony of two or three witnesses; he shall not be put to death on the testimony of one witness. (Deuteronomy 17:3). G-d is sovereign and all-knowing. I know He doesn't need to have confirmation of any sort, but I think applying this commandment to the role of Father, Son, and Spirit in our lives, just somehow shows a grace He has in justice towards us specifically in condemnation. There's also a wisdom in it as those saved under His conviction. Father, Son, and Spirit is a very just and right way of relating to us somehow. It's also full of grace on everyone's account, even the unsaved. All is accounted for. Again, maybe I'm reaching but I think I see a lot of grace and wisdom in this Torah commandment as He has chosen to reveal Himself to us and interact with us as the 3 in 1. It's also kind of reassuring to perhaps find an Old Testament context as followers of Messiah Yeshua in this world through the Levites who had no earthly inheritance as members of G-d's people. "Therefore they shall have no inheritance among their brethren; the L-RD is their inheritance, as He said to them." (Deuteronomy 18:2) It just feels like a place in Torah you can see that Yeshua has secured an inheritance for us among His people as those who have His Spirit and get to commune with Him. It's in the New Testament I know, but just kind of came together more for me in this Torah portion - that I really am a member of His people with a place right now and not just waiting in limbo. :) "But you are a chosen generation, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, His own special people, that you may proclaim the praises of Him who called you out of darkness into His marvelous light; who once were not a people but are now the people of God, who had not obtained mercy but now have obtained mercy. ( 1 Peter 2:9-10) Then one day everything will all just come together and we are all a part of something full and complete. “You are worthy to take the scroll, And to open its seals; For You were slain, And have redeemed us to God by Your blood out of every tribe and tongue and people and nation, And have made us kings and priests to our God; And we shall reign on the earth.” Revelation 5:10 Just interesting to consider what He means by "reign on the earth" because Yeshua is King. That in and of itself has concerned me for some time, but somehow understanding the Levitical priesthood not having an earthly inheritance but having G-d as their inheritance is some context for understanding this Kingdom reality I think. How we can reign with Him but under Him. I worry about even typing that, but the Bible does mention reigning with HIm. "If we endure, We shall also reign with Him. If we deny Him, He also will deny us." 2 Timothy 2:12 Part of me wants to say no to Him when I read that verse because I really don't understand what that means given who He is and who I'm not. Then it scares me because I don't want to say no to Him either. Anyway, I find that verse kind of fearful every which way you look at it. "And if you say in your heart, 'How shall we know the word which the L-RD has not spoken?' - when a prophet speaks in the name of the L-RD, if the thing does not happen or come to pass, that is the thing which the L-RD has not spoken...."(Deuteronomy 18:21) It's good to note that just because it does come to pass does not necessarily mean it is a true prophet speaking it. That need for further confirmation also reminds me of the wisdom I saw in Abraham's servant who knew to wait for confirmation that Rebekah met all the criteria before assuming she was G-d's choice for Isaac. (Maybe that's a good example of what He means by "reigning with Him"? - just very good stewards of His commands? The general realization I gained in this portion, however, is how seriously we are not taking life in this world. Beyond all the spilling of blood we are doing, imagine how He must consider us given that our primary means of entertainment tends to be so violent and bloody. How offensive and hurtful we really must be to Him because it's beyond just a lack of regard for life. It's almost a joke we are making out of it. I don't watch popular movies, but you can't even escape it in our culture - blood and gore and violence as entertaining. That's how saturated we are in it. It's moments like that, that make me wonder if maybe we are further along to the end days than I realize. Just puts in my mind what Dr. Korman says about things happening very fast once they start happening, How wicked we really are, and therefore how little there will be left for Him to sort out once He starts to move perhaps. Today is the day of salvation is a verse that comes to mind. Once He moves, I really don't think people we have long in their own hearts. This kind of takes me back to where I started - how true and just G-d's justice will really be when He will show He has accounted for everything compared to what we have done. Grace is now, and we really are wasting it. Pure evil on our parts regarding the life He has given us and the life of the people around us. So much waste. We don't take life seriously when you see what we are entertained by, and I don't think we take His grace seriously either. We just don't even come close to understanding the kind of regard G-d shows for us or life in general in this portion. This has been a heavy portion for me that way.

Re'eh - "Behold, I set before you today a blessing and a curse: blessing if you obey the commandments of the L-RD your G-d which I command you today; and the curse if you do not obey the commandments of the L-RD your G-d, but turn aside from the way which I command you today, to go after other gods, which you have not known." Deuteronomy 11:26-29 "While he was still speaking, behold, a bright cloud overshadowed them; and suddenly a voice came out of the cloud, saying, “This is My beloved Son, in whom I am well pleased. Hear Him!” Mathew 17:5 One thing that gives me a greater recognition of our idolatrous culture is just seeing His commandments to eat and rejoice before Him highlighted throughout the potion. Almost every profane modern day activity includes food, drink, and some attempt at rejoicing that perverts what it means to rejoice. Just funny to consider how idolatrous our leisure activities and social structure really are in this context I think. And really interesting to see how much we dress up foolish immaturity that idolizes self as adults in our society. it's not so strange what's happening in the younger generation when you really see how immature and foolish adults have been in what they are seeking out and celebrating. We have celebrated juvenility and sought it out rather than teaching our kids to become adults I think. It's just good for me to see how carried away by culture we really are sometimes, how backwards it is at its base, and the eating and rejoicing before G-d commands pointed that out to me. If G-d isn't the focus, it will become about self, and that's just an immature state of being. "If your brother, the son of your mother, your son of your daughter, the wife of your bosom, or your friend who is as your own soul, secretly entices you saying; 'Let us go and serve other gods, which you have not known, neither you nor your fathers, of the gods of the people which are all around you, near to you or far off from you, from one end of the earth to the other end of the earth, you shall not consent to him or listen to him, nor shall your eye pity him, nor shall you spare him or conceal him; but you shall surely kill him...."Deuteronomy 13:6-9 “Do not think that I came to bring peace on earth. I did not come to bring peace but a sword. For I have come to set a man against his father, a daughter against her mother, and a daughter-in-law against her mother-in-law, and a man’s enemies will be those of his own household. He who loves father or mother more than Me is not worthy of Me. And he who loves son or daughter more than Me is not worthy of Me." Matthew 10:34-38 It's interesting to consider the plagues G-d put on Egypt in light of the commandments He gives Israel. I think we can see that G-d was teaching Pharaoh what the commandments we see in Deuteronomy chapter 15 and 16 are teaching Israel. G-d is just and has just weights and measures. I'm starting to notice themes that G-d is pointing me to in these portions I think, and this one I believe is idolatry. Beyond that, it's how very little the world has changed or learned throughout its history in terms of idolatry. It's also how very blatantly and strait-forwardly He has been consistently addressing this issue with us. We are still caught up in the same idolatrous confusion and games we always have been, and whether believer or not, He is still about destroying pagan and idolatrous affinities just so we have to see and deal with HIm. Now, the end times flow very appropriately based on our history in my mind. It also makes a lot of sense that the decision it forces on us is built on the instinct to preserve self. It really is about idolatry and showing us idolatry is about self and denying Him. There's this interesting deception in progressive thinking that they have somehow put all this "mythological" spiritual stuff behind them and are more evolved than religious people because of it. Meanwhile, they are often the ones into ancient eastern spiritualism the most. This portion helped me reconcile that and kind of understand the mindset I think. There has been no progress at all. They haven't learned. They are just practicing idolatry and the hatred of G-d. They are doing exactly what He warned about for thousands and thousands of years. The fact they actually think it's progress is pretty sad.

Ekev - "Man shall not live by bread along, but by every word that proceeds from the mouth of the L-RD." Deut 8:3 Just interesting to consider Yeshua saying this to hasatan when He was being tempted in the desert, and it's really interesting to consider how much this week's Torah portion may have actually been in His heart and mind when He said it. Then as you think about that, it's interesting to consider how much hasatan may have then really heard. Yeshua was so mentally strong that with so few words, He really did silence hasatan and direct Him to something between He and G-d that crossed time I think. Yeshua was doing exactly what the people of Israel couldn't do, and what G-d asked them to do. Fulfillment is a threat to hasatan, so a lot going on here I think regarding that. And with G-d's words, there's almost a dare or something toward evil. It's not exactly that, but that's the best word I can come up with. G-d is very wise in that He knows how to answer evil in a way that cuts through the garbage, which I think is pretty amazing. In doing that, He is also completely fair in that He is hiding nothing, yet He is always still way ahead of them. I can see a little why hasatan is so angry - he never makes his point and always makes G-d's point. Mind boggling. How much strength and power we really do have in Yeshua and the word of G-d. The timing of how G-d gave the law is interesting to consider in the context of Romans I think. "For when we were in the flesh, the sinful passions which were aroused by the law were at work in our members to bear fruit to death. But now we have been delivered from the law, having died to what we were held by, so that we should serve in the newness of the Spirit and not in the oldness of the letter." Romans 7:5-6. There was a lot more happening spiritually here in the children of Israel than I have previously understood. I think there was a lot more spiritual warfare in the hearts of the people I just in that G-d told them not to do those things prior to Moses going up the mountain. Kind of helps me make sense of how and why these things took place, and I think I understand His wisdom and way in how He gave it a bit perhaps. I think we can see another instance of the power of G-d's words. And that's the underlying theme being pointed out to me in this portion this week - the power of G-d's word. It's just amazing to really consider what His word is actually doing to, for, and in us. “As for Me,” says the Lord, “this is My covenant with them: My Spirit who is upon you, and My words which I have put in your mouth, shall not depart from your mouth, nor from the mouth of your descendants, nor from the mouth of your descendants’ descendants,” says the Lord, from this time and forevermore.” Isaiah 59:21 "Therefore you shall lay up these words of mine in you heart and in your soul, and bind them as a sign on your hand, and they shall be as frontlets between your eyes. You shall teach them to your children , speaking of them when you sit in your house, when you walk by the way , when you lie down and when you rise up. And you shall write them on the doorposts of your house and on your gates, that your days and the days of your children may be multiplied in the land of which the L-RD swore to your fathers to give them, like the days of the heavens above the earth." Deut. 11:18-21. I think I see Yeshua's crucifixion and resurrection in this command that almost then seems as prophetic as Isaiah 59:21 did. There's the thorns on His head and the nails in his wrists. You can even see the role of His Spirit in always being with us, teaching us throughout our day. Then you can find us in there as His descendants and I wonder if maybe the doorposts and gates are related to the Kingdom or the congregation of His followers.... I don't know maybe I'm reaching, but Yeshua's Crucifixion, resurrection, and Spirit in the congregation seem like one glorious Shemah all in Yeshua and done not necessarily just as commanded, but as promised. I still struggle with understanding exactly what G-d means when He focuses so much on the word 'one'. It's more than just a reference to counter polytheism I think. It just kind of lingers in my mind that there's more to it than that. Anyway, maybe I'm getting off track and reaching, but it's crossed my mind before and kind of came up again in this potion.

va'etchanan - "Surely this great nation is a wise and understanding people." Deuteronomy 4:6 The more I listen to the circles the world is forcing on us with their logic and "enlightened" understanding, the more I understand why we must stick to what is Biblical very closely. We cannot tarry in the realm of trying to play logic with the world. God has a way of shutting down a useless conversation, (see Deut 3:26) so if you're going in circles - keep the focus of what's scripturally defined as right and real in the forefront and say the truth outright. We will just be spinning around with them in their logic if we don't separate ourselves from the downward spiral of confusion they call logic. As hard and unreceptive as the world will be, that's why G-d needs to become the forefront in our social and political views. The separation between church and state has pigeon holed us, but I don't think there was any way around it as we are not Israel. The nation of Israel is and was to exemplify the difference between His way and the world's way. In all that, I'm just trying to say be ware of worldly logic. Separation of church and state was originally to defend the church from the state, not the state from the church. Now look at how it has been perverted. It's now a means to destroy the church. So the congregation of believers need to take hold of this portion's Torah truth to stand and overcome in this country. "Only take heed to yourself, and diligently keep yourself lest you forget the things your eyes have seen, and lest they depart from your heart all the days of your life. And teach them to your children and your grandchildren." Deuteronomy 4:9 I always think about "wise as serpents, innocent as doves" We have to learn to spot the devil quickly, and keep hold of truth relentlessly. The world's logic is evil, and the idea that we can compromise just to get along and live with each other is going to be shown for what it is - impossible. "what fellowship does light have with darkness" We can't live with rights that excuse sin because sin is about destruction, and it's trying to destroy us. I believe G-d is going to force us to draw lines between right and wrong and include Him in our lives completely for the sake of salvation and testimony and the kids growing up in this country. In all of that, I truly believe people will have to see Him and the Kingdom being built up. One day, there will only be believers amongst us, so no need for any type of separation between believers and state... kind of cool to think about that and the implications. It all goes the way He said it would. Kind of hard though too because "one nation under God" has done a lot to bless me, and lot of faith in this nation's history. Man's best just isn't good enough, and disregarding Torah truth will always catch up with you.